December 1, 2011

Don't do what Elfy Don't does!

DM: "You're all walking along toward the dungeon.  Suddenly, a shadow passes over you.  You all look up and see a large, winged, serpentine..."

Elfy Don't: "I cast Magic Missile at it!"

Everyone Else: "No, Elfy!  DON'T!"

Elfy Don't: *rolls for damage*

I honestly don't know why my brain called up the image of that giant, flying, venomous snake that we saw in the caves a few sessions ago.   Once Jeff said the word "dragon" I had to resist the urge to crawl under the table in shame.

As most of the party dove into the bushes for cover, Elfy Don't stood his ground and readied a wand. (Don't do that)

Ready for the Pro Tips?
  1. Dragon Breath has greater range than a Wand of Paralyzation.
  2. Check your sheet for the Potion of Fire Resistance that you forgot about.
  3. When the DM says that one of the henchmen stands slack-jawed staring at the dragon, HIDE!  Let the hench-patsy suffer the dragon's wrath.
  4. You're probably dead anyway.  Running away from the rest of your party might save their lives.
  5. Drop magic items as you run.  You might get rezzed, your items won't.

This public service announcement has been brought to you by:  a remorseful, impoverished, 2nd level elf in a loincloth


  1. I was wondering what exactly was happening at that table...

    Sound like good advice born of personal experience... =)

  2. Ah, Pro Tip #3, how helpful a thing you be, though often lost to the party that can't take the hint...

  3. Yeah, It's amazing how the exits suddenly become so obvious after your character is toast.